


Saying Goodbye [but dreaming of you]

by Thomaddicted



Category: TMR - Fandom, dylmas, newtmas - Fandom, the maze runner
Genre: Dreams and Nightmares, Funeral, Gally - Freeform, Gay ships, Getting On, Ghost Newt, Grieving Thomas, Holy shit this is sad, I AM SORRY, I cried writing this, Kinda Minewt, Like Supersadness, M/M, Newt - Freeform, PTSD, Paradise, Post-The Death Cure, Post-The Maze Runner, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Pre-The Death Cure, Rituals, Sadness, Safehaven, The Death Cure Spoilers, Thomas - Freeform, brenda - Freeform, dylmas - Freeform, jorge - Freeform, kinda happy ending, minho - Freeform, newtmas - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-13 08:44:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13566978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thomaddicted/pseuds/Thomaddicted
Summary: Post "The Maze Runner: The Death Cure" MovieThomas and the Gladers deal with the loss of Newt.





	Saying Goodbye [but dreaming of you]

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING!!!  
> SPOILERS FOR TDC!! I don't get into everything, but if you've seen the movie, you know what I'm referencing.
> 
> Yes. I throw some shade on THAT part. (WTF People? Why? Why?! WHY!?!)
> 
> SECOND WARNING, This made me literally cry as I typed it.  
> But really. I have so many feelings about this movie and these characters, and I really needed to write this.
> 
>  
> 
> Do you have your tissues? Go grab some. I'll wait.
> 
> Ok?
> 
> Here we go.

Thomas awoke to another morning in Safehaven. 

He began his morning the same each day. 

A quick breakfast of grains and water. An overview of the fields. A meeting with Vince and Minho.

 

Thomas ended his day much the same way. 

 

===================================================

There was no question about what was going to happen.

"Come on guys, we need to go, now. The city is falling."

"Fry, help me lift him." Minho's voice was choked with tears.

"Minho, we can't. We can't take him." Brenda shook her head.

"We can't leave him." Minho sniped back.

"It's too..."

"WE! CAN'T! LEAVE! HIM!!" Minho's shout could be heard clearly over the explosions.

Gally turned towards Brenda, tears in his eyes, and compassion in his voice.

"Brenda, we have to. I know it's risky, but I promise, we will take care of everything."

Brenda pressed her lips into a line, and turned on her heel, and walked away.

They knelt before Newt. Frypan's hand shakily reached out, and lowered Newt's eyelids over the black pupils staring blindly into the sky.  
Frypan wept for his mentor. Gally mourned his role model, even though half the time it seemed he was angry at Newt about Thomas.  
Minho kept silent. His mind trying to shut out the thoughts of what could have been. What should have been. 

 

Minho had scooped Newt up into his arms. Frypan covered Newt's face and torso with his jacket. Gally led them back through the carnage, following Brenda.

 

Boarding the berg, Minho avoided the eyes of all the immunes. He passed by Brenda, coldly, not saying a word. 

The immunes averted their eyes, most being uncomfortable with the vision of loss before them.

Two immunes sitting next to each other, a fair haired boy with short ginger hair, and a Latino boy with dark brown eyes looked at the bundle that Minho carried.  
They recognized the jacket the body was wearing. They understood why his face was covered. They knew that they would ask the same of the other if it happened to them.  
They quietly held each other's hand. They remembered the sandy haired boy who saved them from the underground levels of WCKD. 

Vince had almost gone apoplectic about Minho carrying in Newt, but Jorge immediately jumped into the middle, preventing a row.

"Hermano, place him in the carry storage. He'll be safe there." 

Minho started to speak, but the words were lost on their way out.

"It's okay hermano," Jorge placed a hand on Minho's shoulder. "I understand." 

 

Before placing Newt in the drawer, Minho took a bottle of water, and tore a piece of fabric from his jacket lining.  
He removed Newt's jacket, and while holding back his tears, Minho used the rag and water to clean up Newt's body, the best he could.

After they had rescued Thomas, the berg set a course for the safehaven. The immunes rescued beforehand had already sailed up to the destination a week prior.

The berg landed two days later. 

 

===================================================

Minho carried Newt off the berg. He found a place, up in the foothills, almost overlooking the sea, and lay Newt's body down. 

Behind him, Frypan, Gally, Brenda, and Jorge followed. Behind them, Aris, Sonya, Harriet, and Vince all followed.  
Bringing up the rear were the two immunes from the berg, who had been shadowing Minho for days. They carried buckets and shovels from the camp.

 

Jorge softly said a prayer as the group dug into the earth, using their hands, buckets, and shovels.  
Once the hole was deep enough, they lay Newt down. Jorge continued to pray. He would say certain phrases, and ask the gladers to repeat them.

The others wept silently, leaning on each other for comfort. Minho stood off to the side, alone. 

They each left, at their own time. First Vince, then Aris and the girls. Then Gally, and Brenda, together. Jorge and the immunes followed.  
"Are you okay, Min?" Frypan sniffled, wiping his eyes. 

Minho nodded. "I'll be there later." 

Frypan nodded. 

Minho stood by the grave site, with his eyes closed. He could hear the gentle sound of the ocean. Smelled the clean, fresh air.  
The birds sang. A gull squawked nearby, and another replied in kind. Their cries a mournful, sad sound. As if nature itself was bereaved.

In the peace of the quiet nature that Minho knew Newt would have loved, Minho finally began to cry.

====================================================================================================

In the days that followed, life began to take shape. Thomas eventually woke. He was still aching, physically and emotionally. Minho told Thomas what they had done. 

Frypan and Minho took Thomas to Newt's place, as they had come to call it.

Thomas knelt by the memorial and cried, properly, for the first time. Fry and Minho held him as he wept for his lost love.

 Thomas began and ended his days in the same manner.

The morning after Thomas read Newt's letter, he walked to the beach, and stared at the sea. He began carrying a small stone from the beach to Newt's place. 

He would every morning after.

 

Every morning, Thomas would journey to the foothills, to Newt's place, and cry. He would take flowers, if he found them.  


He would sit in the shade of a nearby tree, and stare into nothingness. Other times, he would sit by the pile of stones they used to mark Newt.  
Thomas would talk as if Newt were still there. Sometimes he would lay on the warm ground.  
Most times he would cry so hard, he felt as if his body were breaking apart.  


Unaware of the boys in the trees.

One day Thomas went up to Newt's place, and found that the stones marking Newt's grave had been rearranged, and formed a heart.

A few weeks later, someone had taken all of the flowers he had pulled, and properly planted them in a ring around the stones.

A few weeks after that, he followed two of the immune boys he saw heading up to Newt's place in the morning.  
He watched as they tended the flowers around Newt's grave, pulled weeds, turned the dirt, and made sure the stones were still in heart formation.  
They stood, holding each others hand, the ginger mop resting on the Latino boys' shoulder. 

Thomas's eyes filled with tears, his mind full of ghosts. 

====================================================

The safehaven worked much like the glade. It was an easy transition as many of the immunes had been taken from their own mazes. 

Frypan was comfortable back in his post as Keeper of the Cooks. 

Gally became Keeper of the Builders again.

Jorge and Brenda used their expertise and became Keepers of the Techs, salvaging stuff from the ships.

Vince became Keeper of the History. He and a few scribes sat around each night, gathering the histories and memories of the survivors.  
They spoke the stories every night, so that they did not forget them.

Thomas tried to become Keeper of the Gardens, but he couldn't do it. Standing in the lush green plots only brought pain to his heart. 

(Go get us some bloody fertilizer, Tommy) 

He was able to help some days

(Whatever you can think of, we've tried it, TWICE)

but other days he could barely get out of bed. 

(Don't LIE to Me!)

All the gladers could excuse Thomas, but Vince refused to let him wallow.

"Get up Thomas, we're burning daylight." 

(Name's Newt Greenie)

"Thomas, focus, stay focused."

(You can't give up)

"Thomas, I need you to run these to Brenda."

(I won't let you)

"Thomas!"

(Tommy)

"Thomas!"

(Please)

"THOMAS!!"

(TAKE IT!!)

 

Thomas ended every night the same, falling asleep on a tear stained pillow.

===================================================

"We can't let him get any lower." Vince argued.

"He has to grieve." Minho replied, coldly.

"We've all grieved! For months now!" 

"Some of us need longer. Some of us lost everything!"

"How much more time do you need?!"

"Thomas needs time! He needs time! We all need time."

"Work should be distraction enough. We can't let people coast."

"I know, everyone has to do their part. Same as back in the glade."

"Those are the rules." 

"Just don't ask so much from Thomas. Not right now."

"Look, I get he's recovering. But you can't spend your whole life recovering."

Vince left, leaving Minho to stew in his frustration.

"You don't know what he's lost. What we've lost."

 

================================================================================================

Thomas woke again, before the light. 

 

He dressed, and crept through the camp, passing the gardens. He took a small flower, hanging from the vines, and walked up to Newt's Place.

In the pink of the sunrise, he laid the flower down.

"Bloody Hell Tommy, aren't you done yet?"

Thomas turned around to the tree, where the voice had come from.

"Newt?" He called out, looking around. Shit! "NEWT?? Is that you??"

"Calm down, you're gonna give yourself a buggin' heart attack!"

Newt stepped out of the shadows. 

Thomas ran over and wrapped his arms around the blonde Brit, and squeezed.

"It's okay Tommy, it's okay."

"Newt." Thomas voice was thick with tears. "I'm sorry Newt. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry Newt. I love you. I'm so sorry."

"Shhh" Newt's voice was calm and steady. "It's okay Tommy. I know. I forgive you Tommy." He rubbed small circles on Thomas's back, trying to soothe him

"No, no, no. Don't. It's all my fault, Newt. You're dead cause I'm an asshole. I could have saved you.... if I had let them..."

"Tommy!" Newt's voice was firm now . He held Thomas at arms length from his body.

A startled Thomas stared at Newt through his tears. 

"Tommy, they would have never cured me. Then, they would have had you, and tortured you. You heard what Jansen said."

"Newt.....how..." 

"Tommy, let me talk now." Newt chided. He brushed Thomas's tears away with his thumbs.

"You know, if your blood is the key to the cure, then they would have never let you die. They would have bled you dry, then kept you alive just enough to keep them in serum."

Thomas thought back to what Jansen had said. About WCKD getting to choose...

"And what happened when they can't keep you alive anymore, Tommy? They would have bred you, like a stallion. Then, you would have your own children being farmed by WCKD."

Thomas had stopped crying. His breath was regulating. 

"Tommy, you couldn't let that be their future. Generation after generation, being bled like pigs. You would have never agreed, and then you know they would have tortured you. They would have killed you."

Thomas leaned in to Newt's body, resting his head on the shoulder he cried on in private, so many times before.

"Thomas, that's no way to live. I wouldn't let you. I still won't. I'm going to love you, Tommy. Forever." 

Thomas looked into Newt's eyes, now shining in the sunlight. He saw the light in them like never before.

"But you have to do something for me, Tommy."

"Anything, Newt. Anything." 

"See them?" Newt gestured behind Thomas, to the two immune boys, as they silently began to clean Newt's grave.

"Those boys are Alex, and Aaron. They are so in love Tommy. They remind me of us. They are scared, but they will survive this."

Thomas watched as the boys worked, they glanced at each other, loving, happy looks.

"They will need a mentor. They will all need a mentor. Someone to teach them how to survive. How to honor. How to stay a team. A family."

Thomas nodded, mutely.

"That's where you come in Tommy. Teach them to be brave. To be proud. To be confident. The world is different now. The world is ready for them."

Thomas watched as the boys stood in front of the stones. He barely heard them whisper. "For Newt. For Thomas."

"Kinda like watching our younger selves, huh?"

Thomas watched as the boys descended the hill, letting their hands separate as they walked back to camp.

"Tell them our story, Tommy. Tell them everything. Give them history. Give them strength."

"What if I can't?" Thomas rasped.

"Then you'll never bloody see me again, mate."

Thomas spun around to face Newt. "That's blackmail!"

"That's incentive." Newt laughed. 

"So what happens now?" Thomas tried holding back a smile.

Newt moved in, and pressed his lips to Thomas's.

Thomas closed his eyes, and savored every second of the kiss. A feeling he was sure he'd never feel again. Something more than any kiss he'd ever had.

Newt's body pressed closer, and Thomas let his hands thread Newt's hair. Their kiss burned into Thomas's soul. He regretted having to pull away.

He hated letting go.

"It's okay Tommy. I'll be back. I'll always come back for you."

 

Thomas woke up, sobbing.

 

=========================================================

It took Thomas 3 days before he approached Aaron and Alex. Until he did, Newt kept his word.

Immediately after, Newt appeared back in Thomas's dreams.

 

"Newt," Thomas asked as they sat, staring at the sea. "What happens when I die?"

Newt leaned over, and smiled. "We get to have sex again." 

Thomas barked out an unexpected laugh, and kissed Newt. 

"That was not the answer I was expecting!" Thomas bit his lip.

Newt smiled, watching the sunrise. 

"Okay, how about this? We get to be together all the time."

"I can deal with that." 

Thomas sighed.

"Do you know..... how long.... that's gonna be?"

 

Newt laughed. A sound that Thomas heard echoed in the endless breaking of the waves as he slept each night.  


He smiled in his sleep.

He ended every night much the same way.

**Author's Note:**

> I regret nothing.


End file.
